Johnny Depp
Charlie Mortdecai

Gwyneth Paltrow
Johanna Mortdecai

Ewan McGregor
Inspector Alistair Martland

Paul Bettany
Jock Strapp

Jonny Pasvolsky
Emil Strago

Olivia Munn
Georgina Krampf

Jeff Goldblum
Milton Krampf

Michael Culkin
Sir Graham Archer

Ulrich Thomsen
Romanov

Alec Utgoff
Dmitri

Guy Burnet
Maurice

Paul Whitehouse
Spinoza

Norma Atallah
Bronwen

Nicholas Farrell
Auctioneer

Karl Theobald
Gardener

Michael Byrne
The Duke

Carly Steel
Krampf's Third Wife

Jenna Russell
Detective

Austin Lyon
Hotel Clerk

Ricky Champ
Sergei

Chris Bearne
Farmer

Benny Maslov
Romanov's Aide

Colette O'Neil
The Duchess

Michael Shelford
Sedgewicks Worker

Junix Inocian
Fang Fat

Jamie Bernadette
Bikini Babe (uncredited)