Ashley Tisdale
Jody Sanders

Simon Rex
Dan Sanders

Charlie Sheen
Charlie Sheen

Gracie Whitton
Kathy

Ava Kolker
Lily

Heather Locklear
Barbara

Molly Shannon
Heather Darcy

Josh Robert Thompson
Narrator (voice)

Darrell Hammond
Dr. Hall

Marisa Saks
Amy

Snoop Dogg
Marcus

Terry Crews
Martin Jacobs

Mike Tyson
Mike Tyson

Lidia Porto
Maria

Mac Miller
D'Andre

Erica Ash
Kendra Brooks

J.P. Manoux
Pierre

Tyler Posey
David

Sarah Hyland
Mia

Shad Moss
Eric

Katrina Bowden
Natalie

Ben Cornish
Dom

Katt Williams
Blaine Fulda

Lindsay Lohan
Self

Jerry O'Connell
Christian Grey

Usher
Ira the Janitor

Macsen Lintz
French Boy

John Atwood
Newscaster #1

Lane Carlock
Newscaster #2

Shereé Whitfield
Real Housewife #1

Angela Raiola
Real Housewife #2

Lil Duval
Kendra's Brother

Angie Stone
Kendra's Cousin

Jasmine Guy
Kendra's Mom

Ashley LeConte Campbell
Antoinette Beauchamp

Kate Walsh
Self

Anna Skidanova
Nadia

Clayton Landey
Sodomized Cop

Kendra Wilkinson
Self (uncredited)

Audrina Patridge
Self (uncredited)

Jwaundace Candece
Real Housewife (uncredited)

Angela Kerecz
Featured Porn Star (uncredited)

Aaron Beelner
Little Man (uncredited)

Elizabeth Davidovich
Ballerina (uncredited)

Joel Rogers
Confused Ballet Patron (uncredited)

Rory Healy
Bedroom Clown / Ballet Audience Member (uncredited)

Moses Das
Bridge Runner (uncredited)

Kendrick Cross
Rescue Worker (uncredited)

Leigh Hennessy
Witch (uncredited)

David Zucker
Packer Fan (uncredited)